Don't Stop Beleiving

Wow, so it’s been a really long time, hasn’t it?? I can’t believe how quickly everything seems to be happening.

This week was particularity weird. I started out Monday morning feeling pretty defeated, thanks to a meeting with the bank man (which I'll elaborate on)... but for some reason this week just got a lot better. Nothing "good" happened, really. Nothing really changed either... well, I should say nothing externally changed. My whole perspective on where I am in my life has though. I don't know what brought it on, exactly, but I have to say, this more up-beat/positive feeling I have is quite refreshing. I wish I could pinpoint what brought it on and get more of that. Maybe it's the coffee. Or the excessive amounts of Glee. And more importantly, Glee gifs.

Anywho... so about the last 2 months of my life.

I had my three month review at work, which went well. Nothing superb, but nothing bad either, so I’ll take it and keep doing what I’m doing. I’m still getting used to things here, and it’s been a little difficult at times… Because I’m a one-person department, I don’t have a lot of interaction with anyone else here, whereas everyone else is pretty consistently crossing paths with each other, so I can be left out of the loop at times. But again, that’s getting better too, and I think I’m going to be a little more pro-active with this – maybe offer to help out with the community show or something like that. Definitely something more to do with production. I still have the days where I feel like my education and training is lacking and that I should have paid more attention in directing class, or took some Drama Ed courses instead…but, when I was in university I had no idea that this career path even existed. I’ve looked into different Theatre Education master programs, cuz UWO did offer one online (but that’s now changed), but the only ones that exist would require me to move to the US or England, and quit my job, which sort of defeats the purpose. I think I'm just going to pick me up some books (hopefully used) and teach myself. I think the experience looks better on my resume then yet another school.

Nearly a month ago (!!!) I flew down to southern Ontario for Shelley and Ryan’s wedding – which was beautiful, btw. Travel took a lot of time, and $$ but it was so worth it! These two are my first friends to get married, and the first wedding I’ve been to that wasn’t family or a family friend. Since I didn’t get to see most people before I moved away in July, it was good to get to see a lot of them and catch up face to face and not just via Facebook and Twitter. There were a few tables full of us “Greeks” and it was good to catch up with them as well. Plus, there was an open bar. And Ryan’s cousin is from TV and from Mirvish’s Dirty Dancing, which I saw her in last December in Toronto and thought she was amazing! (But I didn’t have the chance to tell her, nor am I sure I would have wanted to be “that girl”.)

I also got to see my lil sis and have breakfast with her mid-journey (my big sis was at home sicky) and see some of my fave frat boys that I don’t think I’ve seen in over two years. Still, the weekend wasn’t long enough to get to see everyone, and I’m really bummed that I didn’t get to see a few specific people. But I guess summer vacation isn’t *really* that far off, now is it??

After the weekend away, I got sick. Missed a few days of work, and wasn’t able to see some family that were in town either. But my dad’s BFF (haha) did bring me my dad’s old coffee table and end tables for my apartment which I don’t know how I survived without. And I discovered that I still have a mouse (or mice) living under my sink (I'm determined to catch it and keep it as a pet since my cats seem to enjoy having him around). I still have a lingering cough that just doesn’t seem to want to let up. That’s annoying. At least it wasn’t the swine flu.

Last week I finally stopped talking about getting a car, and did something about it. But, the news isn’t good. I met with someone from the bank, and after going over the numbers, my massive student loan is interfering with my plans yet again. At first I was really, well, pissed off, and determined to make the numbers work out, and get financing right from the dealer or something instead. But then I calmed down and thought about what the bank guy said. He said something to the effect of while I may be able to squeeze by with a car payment and insurance now, and maybe even with the minimum student loan repayment (when that kicks in), I will not be able to afford anything else. No Mr Sub for lunch (there is no Subway nearby, so it’s my new vice), no new clothes, no new shoes (which I need), no new glasses/contacts (which I also need) no trips to the dentist (which I need and don’t have benefits to cover), hell, there would be no trips to anywhere! … And if something were to happen, or I need time off, I would be really quite screwed, and potentially ruin my credit, which could in turn ruin my chances at getting a mortgage (y'know, once I'm at that point in my life).

It’s going to suck – a lot – to have to walk to work when there’s 3 feet of snow and it’s minus 25 degrees… and having to take the bus or a cab to get groceries… and to not have much of a, if any, night life cuz cabs are so ridiculously expensive and the buses hardly run… But…In a few years from now when I’m a home owner, and my student loan is significantly less (although still massive), I’m sure it’ll be worth the few months of suckiness. It would be nice to have some semblance of a savings account again as well. And I’m hoping that after working for a year I’ll get some sort of a raise that’ll help, and maybe I can look into this car things again next year. Just sucks that I’m 26 and never had my own car… I am going to look into the details and cost of renting a car, and might have to do that one weekend a month or something like that to do the grocery shopping and errands and so on. (It’ll be a LOT cheaper – and easier – than cabbing it.)

However, I did venture to the grocery store a la bus this week to see if I could handle it. It did kill my shoulders having to carry the bags home from the bus stop – and I was careful not to buy heavy things, but it wasn’t so bad. I had songs from Glee blasting in my MP3 player, and caught the eye of a few guys about my age that were shopping alone (haha) so… who knows. Maybe I’ll meet someone in the produce department when we both reach for the same tomato and our hands lightly brush against each other...

And then...

And then...

Ok, I'll stop now. But I still have several gifs that would work....

Thus Far

I haven’t been blogging much because there hasn’t been a whole lot to say. I’ve started a few times, but upon realizing it was mostly me complaining and/or about work stuff, I decided it was not in my best interest to post it.

It’s been over a month in this city and at this job, and things are going fine. I don’t love it, but I don’t hate it. I do keep thinking about what’s next (… already, I know…) mostly because I am not a fan of this city… It has crazy potential, but I get the feeling the people here just don’t care. (It’s actually a lot like the Dirty W in that way.) I’m sure if I had a car I would like it more, but it's hard to justify that expense when I can walk to work everyday. There are a lot of locally owned stores in the area I live/work, so in that respect a car isn’t needed – but, most of these stores are only open 9-5… which is when I’m at work... and which baffles me – no wonder the economy here is struggling. And I’m sure once the snow hits I’ll be feeling a lot differently about lugging groceries around by foot, considering how much I hate it already when I need milk or cat littre. (And with that in mind, I'll be surprised if I don't have a car by January. Do I go new with a lease or used?)

Regardless, my head is still in Toronto for reasons that I still don’t understand myself, and I have to stop myself from thinking “Well, if I was in Toronto…” from time to time. Perhaps because that city is so much more alive then here? Perhaps because I know more people there and in the area? I do know people here, but most of whom I haven’t seen in 10 years or so, and they all have their own lives that don’t really involve me. And flying “home” or to see my friends (or attending the wedding next month!!!) costs WAY too much. I mean like, hundreds of dollars and lots of time waiting in airports and landing in other cities on the way. I miss the days when it was $20 and 2 hours on the bus.

It is, however, providing a nice first step into this adult world and this profession, and will eventually allow me to get my finances in order and get the job experience I want. I just wish it was more exciting.

As for the job, some days I love it, other times I don’t. Some days are insane, others are calm. There have been issues, naturally, but nothing major. I just think they forget at times that this all brand new to me – I don’t have the years of experience the people before me have had. I’ve also gotten way to used to how the theatre (and education department) worked during my internship, that I sometimes assume things based on that experience that I shouldn’t. It’s also been somewhat problematic that I’m not from here, and don’t know the city all that well. Like for example, when I’m calling the schools and teachers – I don’t know anyone, nor do I know anything about the school other then it’s name and contact info. It’s called networking, and I don’t have any opportunities to do it. (Which is also making the dating scene completely non-existent for me. Not that I’ve really been trying… I don’t like the little I have seen…)

My apartment is working out, but I don’t love it. Maybe my expectations are too unrealistic from watching HGTV for hours on end. Or I became a little spoiled living in that apartment with dad. The houses (and most buildings) here are generally pretty run down and I can’t believe people live in some of them. While my place is a lot better then the other places I looked, I still wish I would have had more options. From time to time I look at Kijiji to see what’s out there, and have a few buildings and neighborhoods in mind for the future, but they are either too far to walk to work (until I get a car) or overpriced. Being on the ground floor was helpful to move stuff in, but I really cannot stand all the bugs that keep getting in! Nor can I figure out where they are coming from. At first it was only fruit flies, which were annoying, but I could handle. Now there are spiders and moths and house flies and giant beetle-things that about the size of my pinky finger. Ugh…. My apartment is not messy – I don’t know what else to do to get rid of them without potentially poisoning my cats at the same time. I don't like that people walking by can see right into my apartment either. Keeping the blinds shut is killing my poor plants... As well, I am getting annoyed by the noise. I don’t *think* it’s my neighbours themselves, but just the lack of sound-proofing in the building. That and we all have fire-doors which as designed to slam shut behind you. Fun! Especially when I’m sleeping. But really, they could be more considerate and pull the door shut behind them, and not invite people over in the wee morning hours.

But like I said, I don’t hate things here. I just see the potential of the city, the apartment, the theatre, and the job and am frustrated that most of those changes are out of my hands.

Transition to Adulthood

I can’t believe it’s already been a month since I got the call, telling me I got the job. But at the same time, I can’t believe it’s only been a month.

I know the few of you that read this are keen to know how things are going, so alas, here we go. It’s a long one!

Ok, I’ll start with the apartment hunt. By the time I flew up here to find a place to live and meet people at the theatre, several of the apt. listing I’ve been in touch with had informed me that the places were already rented out. I had about 7 or 8 places lined up to view (and a rental listing agency where you pay $25 to see their listings as a Plan B) but only ended up seeing 3 places – 2 were managed by the same people.

The first place I saw was without a doubt NO! It was tiny - only three rooms (bedroom, bathroom, kitchen), it was disgusting, it was old, and it was still priced about the same as all the other listings. The second place was better – 2 bedroom (both small, but workable), main-floor, newer living room floor/paint, but older bathroom/kitchen. It would work, but was not what I had hoped, and was a bit above my budget, and I had to pay my own hydro. I was staying with my cousin and her boyfriend, and since he works for hydro, we started chatting about how much that would actually cost, and after I looked into the set-up costs and arrangements, I decided that this wouldn’t work either.

The third place I looked at was BEAUTIFUL and cheaper then other listings. They were currently renovating, although it was already nicer then the other places I had seen. They had a lot of interest in the place, and wanted to pick the best tenant, which, THANK GOD, was me!! It’s got a loft-style bedroom with the bathroom also upstairs; downstairs has a good sized kitchen (lots of cupboards), and living room, and two entrances – one leads directly outside (which was convenient for moving in!) and the other into a small common-area hallway that leads to the laundry. It’s about a 10 minute walk to work, and enough amenities within walking distance that I will survive without a car (at least until winter). But I definitely think a car will be in my not-so-distant future, as the buses here don’t run that often, and once things get rolling at work, I won’t have the time to accommodate a bus schedule to get things done (and I may even need to drive places for work, and I would prefer to not have to drive the monster theatre van!). I would have been stuck had my dad not stayed in town for the first few days, and if my buddy Sarah hadn’t been in town and had access to a car to help me get the things I need (groceries, furniture, etc.). Ok, I wouldn’t have been stuck, as my family here has made it clear I can call them anytime, but you know what I’m getting at… Buying a wireless router and phone splitter does not need to take 3 hours.

Next, the move itself. Of course my dad and I had to fight again with the stupid building managers at the apartment over the elevator – despite it being the time we had booked. (When we moved it, we could only book the elevator for two hours, and had to drive back and forth to the storage facility where all my stuff was, one truck-load at a time. So, since this wasn’t possible to do in the 2 hours, we had starting taking some things up with us beforehand and got yelled at by the managers for this.) Well, this time, we waited until exactly 11am – the time we had it booked for – but since the people before us had started late, we had to move all my stuff out to the hall, wait for the elevator, pack it up, then unpack it back into the hall on the main floor and then into the U-Haul. My dad flipped, saying we should be able to load things directly onto the elevator and the (stupid) management finally agreed. I thoroughly enjoyed hearing other tenants of the building complain to them about having to wait for elevators. While I will miss the apartment, I certainly will not miss those imbeciles.

Since this technically was my dad’s vacation, and his GF came along, we weren’t going right to my new place, but stayed in my hometown for a few days on the way – which is about 3 hours closer. Normally, we can make this drive in about 15 hours – depending on weather, time of day, etc. But, with a trailer hitched on the back it took FOREVER! We left at about 3:30pm, and my dad was determined to drive through the night as he and his GF could switch off. (Since I had the cats to manage, I stayed in the backseat with them the whole time, making sure they didn’t crawl into the front seat or trunk, and did none of the driving.) At about midnight, we were only half way there and I was ready to cough up the $$ for a hotel room or two, but that didn’t happen. We eventually got there at about 8 am. Yuck. Although my kitties were both so well-behaved, I wasn’t able to get much sleep in the car, as they kept getting up and wandering around, etc.

We stayed at grannies for 3 nights, as my dad wanted to go to Jamboree. I didn’t really want to go, and the weather was so cold and rainy on Friday and Saturday nights anyways. I had intended to work vigorously on the Internship stuff I still have to do, but my grannie is a talker, and I needed to play chauffeur for her, so I got next to nothing done. (I’m still pissed that I have to finish this crap to graduate!)

By Sunday night I was a little more open to being social, and ended up going out to Jamboree as well. It was cold, but not rainy, and I had a good time. I mostly hung out with my cousins and their friends, but chatted a lot with people I went to school with and what not. Add a little flip-cup (flip-flop) to the mix, and I had a good time. It wasn’t very smart for the 3 of us (me, dad, GF) to all go out drinking that night, as Monday morning we finished the move. The aim was leave town by 10am --- we didn’t wake up til nearly 11. And I felt crappy – not hung over feeling, but more like I feel when I have low blood-sugar, so I’m not sure what that was about.

We made it to the city by about 2:30, and my aunt and dad’s cousin were around to help unload. (Thankfully as there were some things I certainly could not have carried up the stairs!) Been here for less than 2 weeks and I’m still not at all settled as I’m waiting for my new furniture to be delivered – most of which will arrive tomorrow! And then next weekend my mom is coming to visit and bring up some of the things I had to leave behind/forgot. (Some pictures are included - but there will be more once I set it up/decorate.)

Dad and his GF stayed in town for a few days, as I mentioned, so I was able to get the things I needed right away. I had planned to do some shopping around for furniture, possibly hit up second-hand stores/kijiji for a kitchen table and TV stand, but wanted a new couch/sofa-bed. Well, I ended up buying them all new. Oops. The guy at the store gave me 15% off everything (despite the promo being 15% off one item) so the prices for new things were quite reasonable – plus I didn’t have to figure out delivery if I went the second-hand route. I did splurge a little and bought a spinny/glider chair and ottoman that I wanted, rather than a traditional chair. I can’t wait to get it – too bad it hasn’t been ordered yet as the fabric I had picked was discontinued, so I had to go back and pick again. (But I think I will be happier with my second choice.)

Spent the rest of my first week here unpacking, and making endless lists of things I still need, things I want (for décor), things I need mom to bring, etc. AND I reunited with one my HS BFF’s (Barb) and ended up hanging out with her and some of her friends. It helps – A TON – that I know people here. I would hate to have to try to meet new people in addition to everything else right now.

I haven’t been sleeping that well, (which isn’t really that uncommon for me). I’m not sure if it’s because I’m still not used to the “house noises” and being able to hear my neighbours, or the getting up at 8am for work, or maybe how my bedroom is set up, or a combination of these things. I might try moving my bed, but I don’t have a lot of options, as the place is heated with hot-water radiators, and there is one taking up some wall space in my bedroom.

Just like this city, the job/theatre has such potential, but it fails to impress. I’ve been there for a full week now, and spent it all reading scripts (for the upcoming season, as well as to make recommendations for the upcoming school tour) and reading the endless supply of files and documents related to my job. I’ve pretty much had to feel my way through this on my own, as I received zero training, and only a few task assignments. That and the woman here before me was crazy over-qualified for this job, so there are big shoes to fill. But, I think I’ll be able to manage. As things come up, I’m figuring them out, but it could be so much simpler if someone would just take an hour to sit down with me and explain things. I find the work culture extremely impersonal – people don’t say hello or goodbye, but just mark on the white-board at the front if you are in the building or not. Weird. I find out most things – even those directly related to my job – by over-hearing it, and have already ran into several situations where my bosses had assumed I knew something that I clearly did not. I don’t even know when I get paid – I thought it was today, as a co-worker had asked me on Wed. to fill out the tax forms so that things could be processed in time, and I heard someone else say something about getting their pay check today, but so far there is nothing for me. Which sucks, cuz it’ll be really tight if I have to wait another 2 weeks. I do, however, like that I’m pretty much left alone to do my thing – now that I have a better understanding of what that entails. And I like that I will actually get to teach and work with the kids (and adults too!) as I’ll be teaching two classes for 13-15 y/o, one class for 15-18 y/o, and 3 sessions to 19+ y/o. It’ll be fun, once I get passed the first classes. I can’t see myself staying here forever, but (thus far, at least) I can see it working for a few years.

So, there is the last month of my life summed up. I will add pictures to FB and probably my 101 Project too, as there are definite updates needed there.